Random thoughts

Little wisps are they, darting across my brain,

Blurry images recalled with flashes of joy, grief and pain.

Its funny the way they work, without reason or rhyme

Some staying sharp, others slipping away with the sands of time.

With blank stares, indistinctive replies I mumble,

To recent acquaintances, while for their names I fumble.

But in great detail I’ll remember to the very end,

The sparkly-eyed grin of a kindergarten friend.

My need for detailed verbal maps, get plenty of nerves frayed,

When in this city, for nearly twenty years I have stayed.

But, I know like the back of my own hand,

Twisty little lanes, shortcuts and secret nooks of golden sand.

Newton-Raphson’s method, formulae, the definition of an applet,

Learnt an hour ago, in I flash will I forget.

Lullabies, silly songs out of my mum’s imagination,

And every nursery rhyme, I still sing with each inflection.

Childish pranks, giggle sessions, fights of the silly kind,

Are etched in permanent ink- crystal clear in my mind.

Rum things are memories, very rum indeed,

They make you smile, they make your heart bleed.

heh heh.. wrote this aaaaages (a year and a half) ago, and realised its still pretty relevant :p

to diet or not to diet…. That is the crucial question for all of us with slightly portly figures.(..only slightly portly, mind you!! ) True, working out is a more effective way of shedding those extra pounds, but some ppl (e.g., yours truly) are too lazy for anything more strenuous than a walk to the canteen and back :p :):). So, the only alternative left is the array of supposedly effective diets. After much thought and consideration.. as well as a week of binging and constant snacking, my mum and I finally decided to give the “GM diet” a shot.

For all those not in the know, GM stands for “General Motors”. The diet was initially developed for GM employees, but its reputation has now spread world-wide. The diet is for 7 days, and the gist of it is as follows:

Day 1- only fruits

Day 2-only vegetables (does NOT include crispy fried potatoes!)

Day 3- fruits and veggies

Day 4- bananas and milk!!

Day 5- 1 cup rice + 6 tomatoes!

Day 6- 1 cup rice+veggies

Day 7-1 cup rice+veggies+fruit juice

Bizarre isn’t it??!! I almost gave up when I saw day 4’s menu… but I happened to glance at myself in the mirror, and that strengthened my resolve! We decided to start on a lazy Sunday, and sent my dad to go stock up on fruits on sat night. He went reluctantly, mumbling something bout “these batty women..!!! “. ( btw, confession- the only fruits I ever eat are apples! )… so Sunday morning.. ½ an apple for breakfast, before rushin off somewhere. I come back home at lunchtime to find a satiated mother, having eaten a papaya, a chikku, and a custard apple!! …lol.. for lunch, I had.. big surprise.. an apple.. now getting thoroughly fed up of the fruit, I somehow choked it down thinking about all the clothes I could fit into in a week!!... the rest of the afternoon was spent staring wistfully at a bottle of pickle, while my mum darted longing looks at my dad wolfing down biryani!! .. finally at 5, we said enough is enough, and ate haldiram’s ‘khatta meeta’ and biryani to our hearts’ contents.. assuaging our conscience, saying that after all, 1^st day etc etc…

The next day was a lot better…. A stick of carrot for breakfast, salad for lunch, and baked potato for dinner.. we felt much better ( though a tad empty in our middles).and then, day 3- baked potatoes for lunch… which became very soggy potatoes by the time I ate them :(:( meanwhile, my mum was sending me grinny msgs bout how she went out and had a proper “shaapaad”, complete with 2 bowls of paayasam!! Sigh. So, by the time I got back, I was super hungry, and madder than a nest of hornets!!..., so, I broke the diet again- 1 bowl of strawberry muesli!!.. yummy!! :):):)…. And then, we realised, day 4 was bananas an milk, and there weren’t any bananas at home… my mum , thinking day 4 was supposed to be tomatoes and rice, happily made lip-smacking tomato rice, swimming in ghee!!… so, we dint have too much of a choice.. to hell with the diet!!... I’m perfectly happy with my size… so what if I can never wear size ‘xs’…. At least I can eat what I want, whenever I want… I’m fed up of rabbit food… seriously, I’ll probly die if I have only bananas and milk for an entire day… for all those who’ve actually completed this diet…. Kudos!!.. you must have amazing self control!!...as for me, all I want is the simple things in life… like a good meal… and a full stomach… and chocolates!! :) …. Ok.. I gottago… my strawberry and chocolate milkshake beckons!! … :) :) :)

One of the very few and far between bright spots of our otherwise gloomy college lives is right around the corner- symposia. The very obvious lack of any sort of culturals makes us long for this event more eagerly than a greedy kid waits for Christmas! As usual though, we were a bundle of nail-biting nerves, wondering what new and wonderful rules the management was going to throw in our faces this year. A couple of days ago, we were summoned to the ‘symposium meeting’ to find out just that. Seated haphazardly around the table in our shocking green conference room, we eyed each other warily, and waited for the axe to fall. As it turns out, it wasn’t as bad as we expected. A quick look at the positives and negatives of the decisions made, .. starting with the good news:

1. They dint try and call off the whole thing- which knowing them, is a fairly big deal!
2. They’ve actually decided to increase our budget (gasp), as this year happens to be our wonderful college’s silver jubilee year. (the actual incremented amount I shall mention in the ugly side! )
3. There is no actual cut off on the number of outside participants allowed into the college (Last year, it was officially limited to 40!)
4. We’re allowed FOUR whole inter college events. If you’re wondering why that’s a big deal, we were only allowed ONE last year.
5. They very sweetly discussed and planned out minute details of the budget with us, right down to mementos for the chief guests and stationery for participants. And we very sweetly, did not bother to note down a word they said!
6. err.. ok that’s about it.. unless u count the fact that we missed class cause of the meeting!

Ok, so now the downside. Due to space constraints, I shall only mention the WORST things, and ignore petty annoyances. Here goes:

1. We have barely any time at all. Only a couple of weeks, to get events done, posters ready, send out invites, print banners, design website and select papers!! Plus, they’re pretty miserly about letting us off class.
2. The final budget proposed at the meeting –I’m so ashamed to say it, sigh- a sickening pittance- 15 grand. And now, they’ve very kindly increased it to 18, with an “yes I know, we are generous aren’t we” air. How we’ll manage with this is beyond me.
3. No sponsors. Period.
4. No posters or banners or any other “fancy decoration works” to be displayed on campus. Only one measley thing inside the hall.
5. No non-techie events at all, the most we can have is a semi-technical quiz, for which we have to reduce and restrict participants.
6. We have to force feed the participants our canteen food, by giving them lunch tokens. I ask you, where is the money for it?? And why would you want to give them dyspepsia??
7. And most embarrassing of all, we have to make sure that even participants follow the dress code, which means anyone wearing a tee or a “pants full of big big packets” (guys and girls!) and if they do stroll in, we have to bodily throw them out!

But other than that, I’m pretty sure we’ll end up having loads of fun organising it. So gung ho for Interrupt ’09! J

Carefully, the yellowing paper I folded and bent,

While he watched eagerly, with mounting excitement

From the deep recesses of memory, instructions I dug,

Till finally for my efforts, I was rewarded with a hug.

Holding it aloft, he let out a triumphant yell

& ran into the open, where a torrent of rain fell.

Down our little lane, with speed increasing evermore,

Flowed water into a swirling pond, right at our front door.

To this he sped, sans umbrella or rain coat

& like a grim sea captain, set sail his boat.

How well a bit of paper can keep him enthralled..

Watching him, rainy days long-forgotten I recalled.

Boat races, water fights, loud squeals of joy,

Damp clothes, drenched hair & a salvaged bedraggled toy.

Buried incidents, all those long years of fun…

I can see them all clearly, when I look at my son.

I look down at the hands folded across my lap,

Once smooth and firm, fettered by age’s fatal trap.

This house-like me, has known happier days,

Now my sole companion, beside my mottled medicine case.

My branches and buds, across the world are spread,

But on occasions like today, they convene round my bed.

Around they crowd- family spanning four generations,

With laden hands, hearts brimming with love and patience.

Joy is unbounded as they gossip, laugh and play

In the midst of it all, I’m far far away.

With many hugs, copious tears and a heavy heart,

I watch as one by one, they inevitably depart.

Their echoes fade away into a silence so deep

As I seek momentary refuge in a drugged sleep.

The end of our sojourn at this college is finally in sight. Now we have one amazing year ahead of us.. a year where we can rightfully claim the top spot in the college ecosystem, and have a great time lording it over the rest of the populace. Most of the juniors are now below our notice, as we set our sights higher and aim at ragging the Profs instead. Barely a week into the New Year, and already teachers shudder and offer long and silent prayers before entering our class. Our reputation preceded us, which resulted in one of the new and enthu people coming up to us and saying- I’ve heard your class is very indisciplined, but I’m sure you’ll be very good in my class- she said this with a beaming smile and looked around for positive reactions… half the class dint even realize she was talking- they were busy with their own conversations, a quarter were eating biscuits and/or biryani, while the rest were snorting gleefully at her ridiculous optimism. Another prof very sweetly told us that she wanted our suggestions, and collected a motley of torn, scruffy bits of paper from us. Poor thing, most suggestions were of the form ‘free hour everyday’ or ‘only ten mins of class per week’. I wonder how long it’ll be before our class manages to break through her composure.

The other extreme- the super strict and ‘I’ll mark you absent and make your parents meet the hod”-type of teacher seems to be faring just as badly with our lot. Every single day, nearly 50 of the 59 students in class bunk the last 2 hours.. every single day.. Naturally, the teachers notice- most however know what a pointless exercise it is to try and rein in final years, and end up having a well deserved break at the end of the day. College authorities however, don’t seem to have this happy turn of mind, and send around a couple of ppl to check on final year attendance- oh boy, do they know us!- the upshot, Hod got dragged into the fray, and told each of the offenders to write an apology letter…. And what do my angelic classmates do??- in spite of my dark hints and ominous predictions, they carelessly dismiss the letter, and bunk yet again!!. oh well, if you cant beat ‘em, join ‘em !!

All in all, a great time for the entire lot of us. Camaraderie is at its peak, knowing its our last year together, we’ve put aside all our differences, and are doin our best to give back to the college what its given us for three years – HELL !!! We come to college with a nonchalant air, not giving two hoots about records and notebooks, our primary purpose being to gossip and have loads of fun. More and more people are trying out new looks, this being their last chance to make an impression. Wardrobes are spruced up, accessories are bigger and better than ever, coiffures are more elaborate, and make up is making a huge comeback. During breaks, in the restrooms and even during class, girls apply layers of shiny gloss, glittering mascara, lustrous lip sticks, and oodles of lotion. Guys meanwhile are spending ages with their gazes locked onto mirrors or any reflecting surface, painstakingly smoothing down individual hairs. Confidence levels are at an all time high, as we strut around like the whole campus belongs to us. Well, it kinda does, for this one year. So lets make the most of it! J

Have you noticed how the silliest of things can have a person in splits, while more genuinely funny incidents are greeted by an expression most resembling a stuffed fish? What tickles each person’s funny bone remains one of the world’s greatest unsolved mysteries. The medium of the joke can also shift its position in the humour scale, or at least affect the responses. I for one tend to laugh out loud a lot more during conversations, even for the stupidest of PJs. In print though, even the funniest of cartoons like Calvin, and the undoubted master of wit Wodehouse himself, only manages to elicit a small smile and an occasional ‘heh’ for the outrageously hilarious bits. Its not that I think they’re not amusing- far from it really. While reading, or even watching a funny movie, I’m roaring with laughter inside my head, while wearing a silly smile on my otherwise impassive face. If I happen to discuss either with someone else though, I end up laughing till my sides ache. It’s a rum thing. There are others though, like my mum, who goes into fits of unstoppable giggles every time she reads and re-reads a Wodehouse. She then insists on regaling us with an excerpt, lavishly interspersed with sudden outbursts of red faced laughs, while tears stream down her face.

Then there are those who laugh for no perceivable reason at all, usually attributed to some remembrance of an old joke, a distant association with a humorous incident, or strains of insanity! The probability of this occurring increases tenfold when you’re with a friend who’s as silly (or more so) as you are. Of late, my hysterical friend and I have been spending a considerable portion of our waking hours laughing maniacally like a couple of kooky hyenas. This is fine if we happen to be at home, or some random place where nobody knows us. We just happened to pick the worst possible place for a fit of giggles- a quiet lab in IIT madras, chock-full of geniuses and prodigies, serious iitians, and brilliant interns – all of whom have mammoth brains and eccentric characteristics. The latter is usually the cause of our frequent outbursts, which draws every bespectacled eye to us, while we try to make ourselves invisible. After a disapproving frown and a glare, they return their attentions to their algorithms and security proofs, while we rush outside so we can laugh unrestrainedly. During lunch again, my friend randomly begins laughing hysterically for absolutely no reason at all, her laugh being very infectious, I join her, while our other friends look on perplexedly wondering what they’d done to trigger such an outburst, .. and delicately edging themselves and their plates as far away from us as possible. The worst ever episode of our laugh-a-thon occurred a couple of days back, while returning to the lab after lunch. We were in high spirits, and got into the elevator along with four strangers. One of them was a weird looking female, who once began making the funniest of faces at a guy- who was pointedly ignoring her. I studiously kept my head down, as my lips curved into an involuntary smile. From behind me, I heard two loud snorts of laughter, and fought even more to keep a straight face as everyone turned to look at my now purple-in-the-face friend. The moment the lift doors slid open, we shot out,- walking determinedly toward the lab, I turned around, and found that my stupid friend had vanished. I walked back looking for her, and saw her hiding in a little alcove, half crouching, collapsing with mirth, and clinging on to the wall for support! Not surprisingly, it took about half a second before I dissolved into laughter as well. Into this scene of cheer walked two of the guys from the elevator, took one look at us, and ran for their lives. This of course was reason enough for a fresh outburst from the two of us. Finally, clutching our sides, and wheezing painfully, we walked back.. and who do we see, but the same kook of a girl again. Words fail me, too many tears dripping down my face onto my poor lappie.